7.5/10
Senior Film Conservator

A definitive 7.5/10 rating for a film that redefined the boundaries of cult cinema. How've You Bean? remains a cornerstone of transgressive art.
Honestly, only if you have a very specific craving for early slapstick that feels like it was put together by people who had never actually seen a wedding. If you hate physical comedy or just want a plot that makes sense, skip this one. It’s for the folks who like seeing Fatty Arbuckle look confused while people jump around like they’ve lost their minds. 🫠
The whole premise is just absurd. Abner and Willie are clearly out of their depth, and watching them try to navigate a formal dinner is like watching two toddlers try to perform brain surgery. It’s messy.
I’m still not entirely sure how you accidentally serve a room full of people Mexican jumping beans instead of, you know, dinner. But the movie doesn't care about logic, and honestly, neither did I after about five minutes. The moment the guests realize their plates are vibrating, the whole thing turns into a total riot.
There’s this one shot where a guest tries to take a bite and the food basically fights back. It lingers on his face for way too long. It was genuinely uncomfortable but also kind of funny in a 'why am I watching this' sort of way.
It feels a lot less polished than something like A Farewell to Arms, obviously. It’s not trying to be high art. It’s just trying to get a laugh out of a pile of beans. It reminds me a bit of the frantic energy in The Chimp, though maybe without the same level of charm. Sometimes it just feels like they forgot to yell 'cut' and everyone kept running around until the film ran out.
It’s not a masterpiece. It’s a fever dream in black and white. Don't go looking for deep meaning here. Just watch the beans jump and try not to think about how hungry those wedding guests must have been. It’s not great cinema, but it’s certainly something.