Cult Review
Senior Film Conservator

Honestly? Maybe. If you like movies that feel like they were made by someone who hadn't slept in a week and was fueled entirely by fever dreams, you'll love this. If you need things like 'narrative consistency' or 'logic,' stay far, far away.
It’s the kind of film where you’re just sitting there, watching a guy who is a dentist for alligators, and you stop asking questions. You just accept the alligator. You accept the teeth cleaning tools. You accept that this is your life now.
There’s a character who has steel hands. The movie doesn't dwell on it. It just happens. He just handles things with these heavy, clanking metal mitts while everyone else treats it like he’s just wearing an annoying pair of winter gloves. It’s deeply funny in a way I don't think was intended.
Then there's the horse. It’s seven feet and ten inches tall. I had to pause the film to make sure I wasn't hallucinating. It makes every room it walks into look like a dollhouse. The way the camera tries to frame this giant beast is clumsy and wonderful. It feels like a home movie filmed by a lunatic.
Watching this reminded me a bit of the frantic energy in The Love Bug, but without any of the charm or the car. It’s just pure, unfiltered chaos. Sometimes it feels like watching a deleted scene from a much weirder version of Friends of Mr. Sweeney, but even that feels like a stretch.
The pacing is non-existent. It jumps from a fish doctoring scene—which is exactly as wet and sad as you imagine—to a team of zebras just standing around. It’s very disjointed. It’s not trying to be a masterpiece. It's just trying to exist, which is a bold choice. 🐊
I don't think I'll ever watch it again. I'm also not sure I regret watching it. It’s like eating a meal made of ingredients that shouldn't touch each other, but somehow you finish the plate just to see what happens next. 🐎
If you're looking for something that feels like a glitch in the simulation, this is the one. Just don't expect it to make any sense when you wake up the next morning.