The Secret of Polichinelle: A dusty, charming little mess

Should you watch The Secret of Polichinelle? If you are a fan of French black-and-white dramas where everyone is constantly whispering or looking shocked behind a lace curtain, then sure. It is perfect for a lazy Sunday afternoon where you want to feel slightly sophisticated without having to actually think that hard. If you are looking for anything modern or snappy, stay away. This is pure 1930s stage-play energy.

The whole premise is just a giant game of telephone played by two very guilty parents. The Jouvenels are the kind of people who probably polish their silverware twice. When they find out their son Henri has a secret life, they don't just talk about it. No, they go behind each other’s backs, sneaking off to visit their grandson, little Robert. It’s all very silly, and honestly, the way Raimu stomps around trying to act casual while hiding a toy for a five-year-old is the highlight of the whole thing.

There is this one moment where the father is trying to be so secretive, but he is just standing in the middle of the room looking like he’s caught in a trap of his own making. It lasts way longer than it needs to. I found myself checking my phone, then looking back, and he was still doing that same worried face. It’s kind of funny because of how much he commits to being a bad liar.

It reminds me a bit of the domestic confusion in A Man of Sentiment, though this one is definitely more focused on the comedy of keeping a secret rather than just brooding over it. The kid, Robert, is the anchor for all these grown-ups acting like children. Every time he smiles, you can see the whole room light up, which is a bit cheesy, but hey, it works.

The film is definitely showing its age. Some of the shots look like they were filmed through a layer of Vaseline, and the audio has that classic scratchy crackle that makes you feel like you're sitting in a dusty attic. But there is a warmth here that you don't find in modern cinema. Nobody is trying to be edgy. They are just trying to get through the day without their spouse realizing they’ve been sneaking off to play trains with a toddler.

It’s not a masterpiece. It’s just a nice, small story about people being messy in a very polite, very French way. Sometimes that’s enough.

• Raimu is basically the whole show here.
• The pacing is glacial, but I kinda liked that?
• The kid is actually cute, not annoying, which is a miracle for films this old.
• Too many scenes in that one living room.