A királyné huszárja: A bit of old-world fluff

Is it worth the watch?

Honestly, only if you have a serious itch for 19th-century Austro-Hungarian romance and enough patience for a movie that doesn't really have a plot so much as a series of vibes. If you enjoy Innocents of Paris for its lighthearted musical energy, you might find something to like here. If you prefer grit or actual tension, you are going to hate every single minute of this.

The whole thing feels like a dusty postcard from a time that never really existed. Empress Elizabeth is portrayed as this benevolent fairy godmother to every sad lover in the empire. It is sweet, sure. But it is also kind of exhausting.

The Vibe

There is a lot of violin music. I mean, a lot. Every time someone looks at the moon, or a soldier adjusts his fancy collar, there’s a swell of strings that feels like it’s trying to force you to feel emotional. It reminded me a bit of the stuffy, overly-earnest tone you find in Ein Lied geht um die Welt, just without the same punch.

The pacing is… well, it’s not really pacing. It’s just lingering. One scene in a garden goes on for so long I started counting the shadows on the wall. It’s not necessarily bad, just very, very relaxed. It feels like the director was afraid to cut away from the pretty costumes.

• The uniforms are remarkably clean for a movie about soldiers.
• The moonlight lighting is so aggressive it looks like they were shooting in a parking lot at midnight.
• There is a scene with a horse that feels totally unrelated to the dialogue, but I didn't hate it.

The acting is fine, I guess. Everyone is very busy looking wistful and standing perfectly straight. You get the sense they were all having a grand time filming in those locations, even if the actual stakes for the characters are pretty much nonexistent. It's not quite as chaotic as Two Flaming Youths, but it has that same dated, theatrical feeling.

I found myself wondering if anyone in the movie actually did any work. Everyone just seems to be wandering around waiting for the Empress to fix their love life. It’s a nice thought, I suppose. But it makes for a very thin movie.

If you watch this, do it for the costumes and the sheer audacity of how earnest it is. It’s not going to change your life. Sometimes, you just want to watch people in uniform sing at each other, right? 🎻✨