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6.4/10
Senior Film Conservator
A definitive 6.4/10 rating for a film that redefined the boundaries of cult cinema. A Passport to Hell remains a cornerstone of transgressive art.
Honestly, only if you have a thing for black-and-white melodrama or really love staring at period costumes. If you’re looking for a tight spy thriller, you’re going to be bored out of your mind. Fans of Elissa Landi might find something to latch onto, but everyone else will probably find the pacing about as fast as a turtle in mud.
The whole thing kicks off with this Englishwoman getting kicked out of British West Africa like she’s a bad party guest. It feels like a very long setup for a punchline that never really lands.
She ends up marrying this German guy, Erich, mostly just to keep from being locked up. The chemistry? Let’s just say it’s about as spicy as room-temperature water. 🧊
Then the father-in-law shows up and acts like the villain in a silent film cartoon. He’s all mustache-twirling energy and instant deportation orders. It’s hard to take the stakes seriously when the guy in charge of the German colony seems like he’s just waiting for his tea break.
Right when you think this is just a soap opera, here comes the spy business. Suddenly there’s a vital map, and she has to choose sides. It’s the kind of plot point you see in movies like Stolen Sweeties or other old studio stuff where the choice is supposed to be agonizing. Here, it just feels like she’s picking which door to walk through.
The scenes move in such an odd way. Sometimes they linger on a close-up for way too long. I found myself counting the buttons on a coat just to keep focused. It's not necessarily bad, but it’s definitely not gripping.
There’s a weird, empty feeling to the background shots. Sometimes it feels like the actors are just standing in a room with a painting of a desert behind them. It’s charming in a ‘they didn’t have a budget’ kind of way, I guess.
Watching this made me think of the lighter tone in Monkey Business, but this movie takes itself so seriously that it hurts. It’s like a heavy weight draped over a flimsy plot. If you want a movie that doesn't try to be a 'profound meditation,' this is just a thing that exists.
Don’t go in expecting a masterpiece. Go in if you want to see how they made these things back in the day, flaws and all. It’s not great, but it’s a time capsule. Just maybe have your phone nearby for when the dialogue gets too thick. 🕰️
IMDb 5.3
1919
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