And She Learned About Dames: A weirdly charming backstage trip

Is And She Learned About Dames worth your time? Honestly, it depends on how much you love the smell of dusty studio floorboards. If you enjoy vintage Hollywood fluff, you will probably get a kick out of it. If you need a plot that actually goes somewhere, you will hate it.

Lyle Talbot is in full smooth-operator mode here. He is basically showing this starlet around the set of 'Dames' like he owns the place. It feels less like a narrative and more like a PR stunt filmed on a Saturday afternoon.

There is a weird, breathless energy to the whole thing. The camera just kind of hangs around, watching people pretend to work. It reminded me a bit of the frantic, slightly disjointed feeling in Sis Hopkins, but without the musical stakes.

Talbot is doing a lot of heavy lifting with his eyebrows. He spends half the runtime leaning against fake walls and talking about how great show business is. It is a little bit gross, but also kind of fascinating to watch him work the room.

Cinematic perspective: Exploring the visual vocabulary of And She Learned About Dames (1934) through its definitive frames.

The pacing is all over the place. One second we are looking at a dance routine, the next we are trapped in a corner while someone tries to sell us on their charm. It does not really have the grit you find in Sixteen Fathoms Deep, but that is clearly not the point.

I found myself staring at the background extras more than the leads. There is one guy in a hat who walks past the camera three times. It is the little mistakes that make these things human.

It is not trying to be a drama or a real story. It is just a snapshot. Sometimes a movie just wants to show you how a stage light works and maybe get a kiss at the end.

It does not have the dark weight of A Woman of Paris: A Drama of Fate, and it definitely isn't as strange as Should a Baby Die?. It is just… there. A little piece of celluloid junk that managed to survive for eighty years.

• Talbot's mustache deserves its own credit.
• The lighting on the set looks like it could burn your eyebrows off.
• The dialogue is about as deep as a saucer.
• Watching them try to make the filming look glamorous is almost funny.

If you have ten minutes to kill and want to feel like a ghost haunting a 1930s soundstage, go for it. Otherwise, you aren't missing much. Just don't go in expecting a story that will change your life.