La mascotte is a weird, dusty bit of royal trouble

Is it worth your time?

If you like old French comedies that feel like they were pulled from a crate in an attic, sure. It is for people who enjoy stagey, theatrical acting and don't mind a movie that shows its age at every single turn. If you want something fast, modern, or remotely realistic, stay far away.

There is something inherently funny about watching a King act like a total goofball because his pockets are empty. King Laurent XVII is not exactly a mastermind. He spends most of his time looking frantic. It is a bit like watching a king-sized version of a Spring Antics type of mess, just with more crowns.

The Turkey Farmer Dynamic

Bettina is the only one in the room with a backbone. She breeds turkeys, she has money, and she doesn't care about royal titles. Watching her shut down the King is the highlight. It is refreshing to see someone refuse to play along with the royal nonsense.

The pacing is… well, it is definitely a movie from a different century. Scenes go on long enough that you can count the dust motes in the background. Sometimes the actors stand around like they are waiting for a train that is never coming. It’s weirdly hypnotic, honestly.

• The costumes are incredibly busy.
• The dialogue sounds like it was meant for a stage three times the size of the set.
• I’m pretty sure one of the extras in the back is just trying not to laugh.

It reminds me a bit of the frantic energy in Reunion in Vienna, but with a much lower budget and a lot more poultry. There is no grand message here. It is just a story about a guy who wants money and a girl who just wants to live her life.

Is it a masterpiece? Absolutely not. But it has a certain charm that is hard to shake. It feels like a relic. 🦃