Una mujer en peligro: A dusty, stagey affair

If you're looking for something fast-paced or modern, stay far, far away from Una mujer en peligro. This isn't for the crowd that needs a plot twist every ten minutes. It’s for the folks who like digging through film archives just to see how people held their cigarettes or tilted their hats back in the day.

The whole thing feels remarkably like a filmed stage play. Everyone stands exactly where they need to be, and the delivery is so formal it makes your teeth ache. There’s a scene about halfway through where a character is trying to express some kind of deep, internal crisis, but it just looks like they’re waiting for the bus. It’s almost impressive how little they move.

I kept thinking about the stark simplicity of Four Walls while watching this, because at least there, the environment felt lived-in. Here, the sets feel like painted cardboard waiting to be folded up after the final cut. There’s a distinct lack of grit that makes the whole drama feel a bit sterile. It’s like watching a story about a fire through a thick piece of glass.

A weird observation

There is a recurring musical sting that plays whenever a 'dangerous' situation arises. It sounds like a cat falling down a flight of stairs. Every single time it happened, I chuckled. Maybe that wasn't the intention, but it’s the only way to get through the slower bits. 🐈

The cast is doing their best with lines that seem to have been written by someone who never actually heard a human being speak in real life. Alberto Romea does that thing where he stares into the middle distance for a full thirty seconds, clearly pondering his lunch or perhaps the existential dread of being in this movie. It’s captivating for all the wrong reasons.

Look, is it worth your time? Only if you have a massive interest in the history of Spanish cinema or if you enjoy the feeling of being trapped in a room with very polite, very confused ghosts. It lacks the punch of something like 7th Heaven, which at least knows how to milk a scene for every drop of emotion it’s worth. This? This just sort of exists.

You might find yourself checking your phone during the long, quiet sequences. I definitely did. And honestly? I didn't feel bad about it at all.