Under Two Flags (1936) is a messy desert epic that I actually liked

If you have a couple of hours and you don't mind a lot of shouting in the desert, you should probably give this one a look. It’s perfect for people who like those old-school adventures where everyone is very serious about their *honor*.

If you hate slow movies where people talk about their feelings while wearing dusty uniforms, you will probably be bored out of your mind. I watched it on a Tuesday night and found myself leaning in way more than I expected. 🌵

Ronald Colman is the main guy, Sergeant Victor. He has that voice that sounds like warm velvet mixed with a little bit of sadness.

He’s in the French Foreign Legion because he took the blame for something his brother did. It’s one of those *noble sacrifice* things that only happens in movies from this era.

Then you have Claudette Colbert. Her character’s name is Cigarette.

I am not making that up. Every time someone yelled "Cigarette!" I half-expected someone to pull out a lighter, but she’s actually a person.

She’s the "daughter of the regiment" or whatever, and she’s totally obsessed with Victor. She’s loud and kind of aggressive in a way that feels very different from the usual ladies in these old films.

But then Rosalind Russell shows up as Lady Venetia. She’s all clean and polite and represents the life Victor had to leave behind.

The love triangle is actually kind of stressful. You can see Victor is torn, but mostly he just looks like he wants a nap and a glass of water.

The Major, played by Victor McLaglen, is the real problem though. He’s in love with Cigarette and he’s super jealous of Victor.

McLaglen plays the guy like a big, angry bear. He keeps sending Victor on suicide missions just to get him out of the way.

It’s a bit mean, honestly. There is this one scene where he’s just staring at them from a distance and you can practically see the steam coming out of his ears. 😤

The desert looks great in black and white. There’s this one shot where the sun is hitting the dunes and it looks like a painting, even if it’s clearly a soundstage for half the movie.

The extras in the background sometimes look like they aren't sure where to stand. I noticed one guy in the back of a crowd scene who was just fiddling with his hat for like ten seconds.

It’s those little things that make me love these old movies. They aren't perfect and polished like the stuff we get now.

The battle at the end is actually huge. There are so many horses and so much gunsmoke you can barely see what’s happening.

It feels chaotic and loud. I think they actually used real explosions back then, which is probably why it looks so scary when the walls start crumbling.

Cigarette gets this big hero moment that is honestly a bit much. She rides through a sandstorm to save the day, and it’s very dramatic and over-the-top.

I felt a little bad for her. She tries so hard to get Victor to notice her, but he’s just so focused on being a "gentleman."

If you’ve seen Riders of the Desert, you know the vibe, but this has a much bigger budget. You can tell they spent a lot of money on the fort and the costumes.

The dialogue is kind of clunky sometimes. People say things like "My life is a shadow!" and they say it with a straight face.

It made me chuckle once or twice. But Ronald Colman sells it because he’s just so charming.

There’s a scene where Nigel Bruce shows up and he’s basically just being himself. He adds a bit of humor when things get too heavy, which is nice because this movie is heavy.

I did find myself checking the time around the middle of the movie. It drags a little when they are just sitting around the garrison talking about their pasts.

But then the Arabs attack and the energy picks right back up. The way they filmed the cavalry charges is actually pretty impressive for 1936.

One thing that bothered me was how easily the Major changed his mind at the very end. It felt a bit rushed, like the writers realized they only had five minutes left of film.

Still, it’s a solid flick. It’s got that dusty adventure feel that you just don’t get anymore.

Is it a masterpiece? Probably not. But it’s a good way to spend an afternoon if you like melodrama and sand.

Things I noticed:

• The hats in this movie are ridiculous and I want one.
• Claudette Colbert’s accent goes in and out a bit.
• There is a lot of saluting. Like, an exhausting amount of saluting.
• The music gets really loud whenever someone looks sad.

I’d say it’s worth a watch just to see Colman and Colbert together. They have a weird chemistry that shouldn’t work, but somehow it does. 🎥

It reminded me a little of A Man's Past in how it deals with guys trying to outrun their mistakes. Only this one has way more camels.

Anyway, give it a shot if you find it on a streaming service or a late-night TV channel. It’s better than most of the boring stuff they put out today.