All American Drawback: Why is a puppet playing football?

Is this for you?

If you like old-school, slightly cracked Hollywood oddities where logic takes a vacation, you might get a kick out of All American Drawback. If you need a movie to actually make sense or if puppets give you the creeps, stay far away. You have been warned. 🏈

Look, I know what you’re thinking. Why on earth am I writing about a movie where a ventriloquist dummy is the star quarterback? Honestly, I don't have a good answer. Sometimes you fall down a rabbit hole of old, forgotten celluloid and just decide to stay there for an hour or two.

The whole thing feels like a fever dream from a different century. Charlie McCarthy is treated like a real person by everyone on screen, which creates this strangely uncomfortable energy that never really goes away. When he is flirting with the college girls, I found myself looking away at the wall. It’s just… a lot.

There is this one scene where he’s arguing with the college board members, and they are all acting so serious. It is hilarious. Watching a grown man in a suit shout at a wooden doll about football tactics is the kind of thing that makes you question why we even bother with modern blockbusters.

The football scenes are barely football. It looks more like a chaotic stage play that got lost on its way to a stadium. Nobody really knows how to tackle properly, and half the time it looks like the extras are just waiting for their lunch break.

I couldn't help but compare the weirdness here to the strange, disjointed energy found in King, Queen and Joker. There’s that same feeling of a movie just kind of vibrating on a frequency nobody else can hear.

Errol Flynn is in this, too, though he seems like he’d rather be anywhere else. You can almost see him wondering how his career led him to share screen time with a pile of pine and paint. 🪵

It’s not a masterpiece. It’s barely even a proper movie. But there is a charm to how completely absurd it is. It’s the kind of film you watch when you want to feel like you’ve traveled back in time to a very confused, very strange party.

Sometimes the audio cuts out, and the frame jumps like the film strip was chewed on by a mouse. It actually adds to the experience. It feels like a secret.

• Charlie McCarthy is surprisingly good at insults.
• The football gear looks like it was made of cardboard.
• The ending makes absolutely no sense.

Don't look for a lesson here. Don't look for acting awards. Just accept the wooden guy for who he is and enjoy the ride. Or don't. I'm not your boss. 🤷‍♂️