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4.9/10
Senior Film Conservator
A definitive 4.9/10 rating for a film that redefined the boundaries of cult cinema. Animal Sumo remains a cornerstone of transgressive art.
If you're looking for a serious sports drama, turn back now. Animal Sumo is exactly what it sounds like: a bunch of animals pushing each other around in a circle.
It’s perfect if you like weird, short-form stuff that doesn't demand anything from your brain. If you’re the type who gets annoyed by movies that aren't 'grounded' or 'realistic,' stay far, far away.
The whole thing feels like something you'd stumble upon at 3 AM on a streaming service you forgot you subscribed to. It isn't trying to be Glorious Betsy, and that’s a good thing. It’s just... monkeys and bears in diapers.
The monkey is clearly the star here, but the pelican? That bird has no business being in a sumo ring. Its beak is a liability, and honestly, the referee should have called a foul.
The goat fight was the highlight for me. There's this moment where they just lock horns and stand there for way too long. It’s not intense. It’s just awkward. I loved it.
There's a complete lack of tension. You know the monkey is going to win because, well, the movie is named after him. It’s not like The Danger Girl where you’re actually worried about the outcome.
The animation style is... let's call it 'handmade.' Sometimes the animals look like they're floating a few inches above the sand. The ring looks like it was drawn with a shaky hand.
The crowd noise in the background sounds like it was recorded in a busy cafeteria. It’s weirdly distracting. Why are the animals cheering in English? That felt like a choice.
I found myself staring at the background textures for too long. They didn't put much effort into the environment. It reminds me of the low-budget charm you sometimes find in old flicks like At Piney Ridge, but way more chaotic.
Honestly, the pacing is all over the place. The bear match is over in ten seconds, but the monkey vs. pig fight felt like it lasted a lifetime. It’s not a masterpiece. It’s barely a movie. But I didn't turn it off, and that counts for something, right? 🐒
