College Scandal: A murder mystery that forgets it's a mystery

Is it worth your time?

If you have a thing for black-and-white mysteries that move at the speed of a Sunday stroll, sure. You’ll probably like this if you enjoy 1930s campus tropes where everyone talks like they’re reading off a teleprompter. If you want a gritty, high-stakes thriller, you’re going to be bored to tears within twenty minutes. 🙄

College Scandal is one of those movies that exists in a weird vacuum. You’ve got a series of grisly murders, but the tone is so light you’d think they were just talking about a lost textbook. It’s strange watching people react to a dead body like it’s a minor inconvenience before heading off to a dance.

The detective work is… something.

Seth Dunlap takes up the mantle of investigator, but he’s basically just wandering around campus asking questions until he bumps into the answer. The chemistry is hit or miss. Sometimes it’s snappy, other times it feels like the actors are waiting for the director to yell 'cut' so they can grab a sandwich. There’s a specific scene where the dialogue gets so convoluted I had to rewind it twice, only to realize it didn't actually matter.

Speaking of feeling dated, there’s an energy here that reminds me of lighter, sillier efforts like The Funnymooners. It lacks the punch you’d get from a real noir, but it’s not trying to be that. It’s just trying to be a distraction.

• The wardrobe department really put in the overtime.
• The red herrings are so obvious you can smell them from the hallway.
• I swear the same background extra appears in three different rooms at once.

The pacing is all over the place. One minute we’re in the middle of a tense interrogation, and the next we’re watching a musical interlude that adds absolutely nothing. It’s the kind of editing that makes you wonder if they just ran out of film and had to patch it together with whatever was lying around.

Don’t go in expecting a masterclass in suspense. It’s a B-movie through and through, and honestly? That’s fine. It’s not trying to solve the human condition. It’s just trying to keep you awake for an hour or so. If you’ve seen The Farmer's Daughter, you’ll recognize the vibe—it’s polished but ultimately fluff.

I found myself zoning out during the third act. The killer’s reveal isn't exactly a shocker if you’ve been paying even the slightest bit of attention. But hey, it’s a quick watch. Sometimes that’s all you need on a rainy afternoon when you don't want to think too hard.