5.7/10
Senior Film Conservator
A definitive 5.7/10 rating for a film that redefined the boundaries of cult cinema. How I Play Golf, by Bobby Jones, No. 3: 'the Niblick' remains a cornerstone of transgressive art.
If you like golf, you might find this interesting for about three minutes. If you hate golf, you’ll probably find this a bit like watching dry toast get buttered. It’s definitely not for anyone looking for a narrative, because the 'plot' is really just Bobby Jones being nice to people who are clearly not very good at golf.
I sat down expecting a proper movie, but got a lesson in how to hit a ball out of a sand trap instead. It’s weird how much time people used to spend on these kinds of instructional shorts. It feels like watching a The Barber's Daughter, except with way more dirt and fewer haircuts.
Bobby Jones has this calm, almost sleepy way of talking that makes you feel like you're actually learning something, even if you’ve never held a club in your life. He keeps correcting the actors, Huntley Gordon and Vivien Oakland, who seem to be trying very hard to act like they are having fun in the sand.
The best part is watching them try to look natural while standing in a pit of sand. You can almost see the director yelling at them to smile. It’s way more awkward than the tension in The Texas Kid, but in a much sillier way.
The niblick is basically an old-school 9-iron, for those of you who aren't obsessed with gear. Bobby holds it like it’s a magic wand. He doesn't even look like he's trying when he hits the ball. It’s infuriating, really.
Honestly, the whole thing feels like it belongs in an archive next to The Wrecker, just because of how dated the whole vibe is. It’s not a masterpiece, it’s just a guy showing off his hobby to two people who probably just wanted to go to lunch. ⛳
Don't expect drama. Don't expect a twist ending. Just watch it if you want to see a guy from the 30s be really good at one very specific thing.
