6.2/10
Senior Film Conservator

A definitive 6.2/10 rating for a film that redefined the boundaries of cult cinema. I Am a Thief remains a cornerstone of transgressive art.
If you like movies that know how to get in and get out, you’ll dig I Am a Thief. It is short, punchy, and doesn't try to be anything more than a fun little train heist.
If you need deep character studies or grand cinematic statements, stay away. This is pure, low-budget comfort food for fans of old-school mystery setups.
The whole thing feels like it was put together in a weekend, which is actually a compliment. Everyone is on a train, everyone is lying, and there’s a necklace that seems to be the only thing keeping the plot moving forward.
Mary Astor is doing a lot of heavy lifting here. She has this way of looking at people that makes you wonder if she’s about to steal their watch or fall in love with them. It’s hard to tell, and that’s the best part.
The pacing is fast. Maybe too fast? Sometimes you barely get to know someone before they’re being interrogated or running down a hallway. It reminded me a bit of the frantic energy in The Misleading Lady, where things just sort of happen to people until the credits roll.
There is this one shot of a dining car that lasts maybe five seconds, and for some reason, I just couldn't stop looking at the wallpaper. It’s peeling in the corner. You can tell they were working with a shoestring budget, but it actually adds to the grimy charm of the whole affair.
There are no big, sweeping speeches. Just a lot of people in cramped rooms trying to outsmart each other. It’s refreshing, really. No one is trying to explain the "human condition" here. They’re just trying to get the goods.
Is it perfect? Not even close. There’s a scene near the end that feels like it was spliced together from a completely different movie, but honestly, it’s funny enough that I didn't care.
If you have an hour to kill, put this on. It won’t change your life, but it’s a decent way to spend a rainy afternoon. Just don't expect the train to actually arrive anywhere interesting.

IMDb 5.7
1913
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