Liebeskommando: Uniforms, Secrets, and a Whole Lot of Nonsense

Is it worth your time?

If you have a soft spot for pre-war European fluff where people are constantly saluting and looking bewildered, sure. But if you need your historical comedies to have at least a shred of common sense regarding how people actually talk, skip it. It is for the crowd that likes their humor broad and their plotlines thin as a sheet of parchment. 🥨

There is something inherently goofy about watching a period piece where everyone acts like they’re in a high school play. The premise—girl dresses as brother to survive military school—is the kind of thing that worked way better in the days of The W Plan or similar genre entries. Here, though, the stakes feel non-existent.

Cinematic perspective: Exploring the visual vocabulary of Liebeskommando (1931) through its definitive frames.

Dolly Haas is doing a lot of heavy lifting. She’s got that wide-eyed energy that makes the whole 'secret identity' thing almost believable, provided you squint really hard. The moment she enters the academy, the movie just kind of forgets that she’s clearly a woman. Everyone just shrugs. It’s like, oh, okay, another cadet with a high voice and delicate features? Carry on then!

The uniforms are immaculate, I’ll give them that. They spend so much time polishing buttons and standing in rows that I started to feel like I was in basic training myself. Sometimes it gets a bit tedious, honestly. You just want them to stop marching and start actually doing something, but the movie is addicted to its own aesthetic.

Cinematic perspective: Exploring the visual vocabulary of Liebeskommando (1931) through its definitive frames.

There’s a scene involving a mess hall that goes on for way too long. The background actors look like they are just waiting for a lunch break that never came. It’s oddly specific, but there’s this one guy in the back row who can’t stop fidgeting with his hat. I couldn't stop looking at him. It was more interesting than the dialogue.

It’s not as punchy as Who Hit Me?, that’s for sure. It lacks that sharp, mean-spirited edge that makes those kinds of films fun. Instead, it feels like it’s trying to be polite. It’s a very polite movie about military deception.

Final thoughts, if you can call them that

• The mustaches in this film have their own gravitational pull.
• The barracks scenes are suspiciously clean. Where is the dirt?
• I’m still not sure if the brother is actually relieved or just lazy.
• Everything feels like a stage set, even when they’re 'outside.'

It’s fine for a rainy afternoon when you don’t want to think too hard. It’s not going to change your life, and it definitely won't make you want to join the Austro-Hungarian army. But it exists. And sometimes, that’s enough. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯