Please (1933): Bing Crosby vs. An Aspiring Nobody

Is it worth your time?

If you like old-timey musical shorts where everyone talks a little too fast and the plots are basically napkin sketches, you'll probably get a kick out of Please. If you need character development or, you know, a story that doesn't feel like a setup for a single joke, stay away. It’s for the folks who want a hit of 1930s comfort food.

The whole thing hinges on this guy Elmer Smoot thinking he can actually out-sing Bing Crosby. It’s funny because, well, it’s Bing Crosby. The irony isn't exactly subtle, but it works in that goofy, black-and-white way.

Beth Sawyer is the object of their affection, and she plays it exactly how you’d expect—lots of wide eyes and polite nodding. The music teacher angle is just an excuse to get people singing on screen, which is fine by me. Honestly, I’ve seen more dramatic tension in a game of checkers.

Odd little moments

• The way Smoot enters a room is just... aggressive. He walks like he’s trying to intimidate the floorboards.
• There’s a moment during the recital prep where the camera just sits there for an extra beat, and you can see someone in the background almost trip over a chair. They kept it in!
• Bing just looks bored half the time, which is actually kind of a mood.

It’s not as interesting as the surreal vibes you get in something like The Sculptor's Dream, but it’s got a rhythm. It moves fast, says what it needs to say, and then just sort of ends. No big, booming finale, just a shrug of a conclusion.

I found myself comparing it to the pacing in Swim or Sink (S.O.S.). Both have that desperate need to fill every second with movement, even if the movement doesn't really go anywhere. It’s frantic, a bit silly, and frankly, kind of charming if you don't overthink it.

It’s barely a movie, really. It’s more like a filmed variety sketch that someone decided to give a title card to. If you’re looking for something that feels like a heavy cinematic meal, look elsewhere. This is just a snack. A sweet, slightly weird, black-and-white snack. 🎶