DbcultAccessing Vault...
5.5/10
Senior Film Conservator
A definitive 5.5/10 rating for a film that redefined the boundaries of cult cinema. Probation remains a cornerstone of transgressive art.
Honestly, you could do better, but you could definitely do worse. If you are into those old movies where people talk like they are reading off a legal contract, you might get a kick out of it. If you prefer things that move faster than a glacier, you will probably be bored out of your mind by the twenty-minute mark.
The whole premise is just dripping with that specific type of early Hollywood sermonizing. A girl needs to be "fixed," so the uncle-judge sends a kid who is basically a project. It is like The Weakness of Strength but with way less fire and way more sitting around in fancy cars talking about character.
There is this one scene where the socialite is just lounging around looking miserable in a way that feels very staged. It is like the director told her, "Look bored, but also look like you have money." She nails the look, but there is zero heat between her and the driver. It is supposed to be a romance, I think? Or maybe just a life lesson? It’s hard to tell.
Every time the judge speaks, I kept waiting for a gavel to bang, just to break up the monotony. The movie tries to be about redemption, but it feels more like a chore for everyone involved. It reminded me a bit of the pacing in One Wonderful Night, but with less actual night-time fun.
Is it a total disaster? No. It is just… there. It sits on the screen, says its lines, and disappears from your memory the second the credits roll. Sometimes that is all you need on a Tuesday, right? Maybe not.
If you really want to see someone trying to fix their life, maybe go watch Millionaires instead. At least that one has a bit more personality. This one just feels like a draft that they forgot to rewrite before sending to the cameras.