Roaring Roads is a weird little relic of a movie

Is this thing worth a watch?

If you like movies that feel like they were stitched together with twine and sheer willpower, maybe. It’s for the folks who get a kick out of dusty black-and-white stunts and cars that look like they’d fall apart if you sneezed on them. If you’re looking for a tight script or anything resembling logic, stay far away.

David Morton is basically the classic "good boy" trapped by his aunts. Then comes Gertrude, and suddenly he’s a race car driver. It’s the kind of jump in logic that makes me wonder if I missed a reel.

The Gangster Problem

The bad guys in this are about as threatening as a wet paper bag. They show up, scowl, and try to stop the race, but honestly, the cars are doing a better job of trying to kill everyone involved. I spent most of the runtime wondering if the stunt drivers were actually having fun or just terrified.

There’s this one sequence where the car is bouncing over a dirt road, and I swear the camera operator almost lost their breakfast. It’s shaky, it’s messy, and it’s arguably the best part of the whole film.

A Few Notes from the Couch

• The aunts are played for laughs, but I just felt tired for them.
• The race scenes are long. Like, really, really long.
• There’s a moment where a gangster gets out of a car and just stands there looking confused. I relate to that gangster.
• I kept comparing the pacing to something like The Crimson Trail, which at least knew when to cut to the chase.

It’s not trying to be a masterpiece. It’s just trying to fill an hour of time before the main feature. There’s a strange, hollow energy to the whole thing, like the actors knew the plot was thin and just decided to lean into the noise.

I caught myself looking at my phone more than once. Not because I was bored, exactly, but because the movie stops being interesting for about ten minutes at a time. It’s fine background noise, but if you sit down to really watch it? Good luck. 🏎️