Watching 1934 Hollywood stars act like regular, slightly awkward people

If you have any interest in the machinery of old Hollywood, you’ll probably get a kick out of this. If you’re just looking for a movie with a plot, turn back now. This is essentially a curated home movie for people who weren't even born yet.

It’s not exactly The House of Fear, is it? It’s more like watching your grandparents' vacation slides, if your grandparents were major 1934 movie stars.

The whole thing feels disjointed. You go from a ship set to a train station, and then suddenly you're at a party for celebrity kids. It’s bizarrely paced. At one point, the transition is so abrupt I thought my player skipped a track.

There is this one moment where they’re on a boat for The Captain Hates the Sea, and honestly? They look bored. You can tell they were just told to 'act natural' for the camera, so they start laughing at absolutely nothing. It’s so stiff it actually hurts to watch. 😬

Seeing Jackie Cooper on the Treasure Island set is a nice bit of trivia, though. He looks like a kid who just wants to go home, which is frankly relatable.

There isn't much to analyze here. It’s just ghosts in fancy suits trying to look pleasant for a lens. It doesn't have the grit of something like Blockade or the odd energy of Morals. It’s just... footage.

Little things I noticed:

• The way everyone holds their hats when the wind blows. It’s like a reflex.
• The quality is obviously rough, but the shadows look surprisingly crisp in that one regatta scene.
• The party for the kids is just a chaotic blur of people who don't know where to stand.

It’s not a masterpiece. It’s barely a film. But it’s a weirdly honest look at how fake these people were forced to be for the public. They don't look like stars here. They look like people at a corporate retreat they really don't want to be at.

If you watch this, don't expect a narrative. Just watch the background. The background is where the actual life is hiding. 🎞️