Sword of the Arab: A dusty relic that barely holds up

Is it worth the watch?

Honestly, only if you're a completist for early silent-era fluff. If you need something that moves fast or makes actual sense, stay away. People who love historical oddities will find bits to giggle at, but everyone else? Probably going to fall asleep by the second act.

The whole thing feels like it was filmed in someone’s backyard in California, but they really, really want you to believe it’s the Arabian desert. The palm trees look like they’re having a bad day, and the sand just looks like… dirt. It’s kind of funny in a sad way.

The vibe

Duncan Renaldo is doing his best, but there's this weird stiffness to his movements. He handles the sword like it’s a baguette he’s afraid to break. Classic stuff.

There’s a scene where a group of extras is supposed to be looking menacing, but they mostly look like they’re waiting for a bus. One guy in the back is definitely picking his teeth. I spent ten minutes just watching him instead of the main action.

This movie reminds me a bit of the frantic energy in The Jungle Princess, though that one had a lot more personality. Here, everything just feels a bit… thin. Like they ran out of budget for the scenery and just used a painted curtain.

• The fake mustaches are doing way more acting than the actual cast.
• I’m pretty sure the same goat shows up in three different scenes.
• The pacing is just… non-existent. It stops and starts like a broken tractor.

Final thoughts

It’s not good, but it’s not boring in a way that hurts. It’s just kind of there. If you’re looking for something that makes you think, look elsewhere. If you want to see how movies used to be made when they just didn't care about realism, give it a go. Just don't blame me when you're checking your watch. 🕰️

Maybe it’s not as rough as Wrath of Love, but it definitely lacks the spark. It's just a dusty, weird little slice of film history that probably should have stayed in the vault.