The Cactus Kid (1935): A dusty, quick-draw mess

Is it worth your time?

If you like your movies to feel like they were filmed during a lunch break in 1935, sure, give it a go. This is pure, unadulterated B-movie filler for people who find Guns for Hire a bit too sophisticated. If you are looking for a deep mystery or character work, you will probably hate it. Honestly, it is barely an hour of people riding horses and looking suspicious in shadows.

The whole thing kicks off with a cattle drive that ends in a payout. You know the drill. Someone gets paid, someone gets greedy, and suddenly there is a knife in someone’s back. It is all very predictable, but there is a certain charm to how quickly they get to the stabbing.

Notes from the screen

• Starlight the Horse actually has more screen presence than half the human cast. 🐎
• The dialogue feels like it was written on the back of a crumpled napkin during a windstorm.
• There is a scene in the saloon where a guy leans against a post so hard I thought he was going to fall over. Nobody acknowledged it.

Jack Perrin plays the lead with this intense, squinty-eyed stare that suggests he’s either deeply troubled or just trying to remember his lines. It is hard to tell. The way the plot moves is just bizarrely fast. One minute he is getting paid, the next he is running for his life across the desert.

The fight scenes have that classic 'flailing arms' aesthetic where nobody actually connects. It makes me miss the tighter choreography in something like Dangerous Waters. Here, it feels like they are dancing around each other to avoid getting dust on their boots.

I caught myself looking at the background extras more than the main plot. There is this one guy in a hat who stands in the back of the town square for about ten minutes, just doing absolutely nothing. He’s the real star of the film, honestly. Just a man, a hat, and a dream of being anywhere else.

It’s not a masterpiece. It’s not even a particularly good western. But there’s something about the way these old films just exist, you know? It doesn't ask for much. It just shows up, delivers the knife-in-the-back trope, and leaves you to figure out why you watched the whole thing in one sitting. 🤠

Sometimes you just need a movie that doesn't try to be anything more than it is. Even if 'what it is' happens to be a bit of a disaster. Grab a coffee, ignore the plot holes, and watch the horses.