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Cult Review
Senior Film Conservator
Okay, so Call Me A Doctor… look, if you’re into really old, kinda bonkers movies where the plot is just a suggestion, you might get a kick out of this one. It's definitely not for folks who need things to make perfect sense or want a tight, suspenseful story. Think of it as a weird curiosity more than a polished film. You'll probably hate it if you expect any sort of modern pacing or even basic medical accuracy. 🧐
The premise is simple enough: lunatic escapes, pretends to be a doctor. But the execution? Oh, the execution is where things get The Phantom Butler-level strange. Wilfred Clarke, our 'doctor' for the day, doesn’t really act like a doctor. He just… *asserts* himself. It’s like he woke up one morning and thought, 'Today, I heal.'
His escape scene, right at the start, is super quick. One minute he's in, the next he's out. No big explanation or anything. It sets the tone for the rest of the movie, honestly: just go with it. We don't really see him planning much. He kinda just falls into this doctor role, which is kinda the funniest part.
What really gets me is how easily everyone buys it. He doesn't have credentials. He doesn't have a medical bag, at least not a proper one. He just *shows up* somewhere, starts giving orders, and people just nod along. There’s a scene where he’s examining a patient, and his technique is… well, it’s a lot of prodding. Like he’s trying to find a hidden button. 🤷♀️
Ethel Gibson plays one of the nurses, and her reactions are priceless. She gives him these little sideways glances, like she's almost onto him but then just shrugs it off. You can almost feel her thinking, 'This guy's weird, but hey, he's wearing a coat, so must be legit.' It’s that kind of subtle, almost accidental comedy that works best.
The movie gets a little better once it leans into how ridiculous the whole thing is. There are moments when Clarke's character almost slips up, and the tension is… minimal. You never really feel like he's in *real* danger of being caught, just perhaps mild embarrassment. Like he’s putting on a play and everyone’s too polite to tell him he’s bad at it.
One particular moment sticks out: he's giving medical advice, and it's just a string of really confident, utterly nonsensical words. It sounds like he picked them out of a dictionary randomly. Nina Wright’s character, who I think is a relative of the patient, just listens intently. Her face is a blank slate. Maybe she’s just tired, you know? It's a long day.
The pacing is pretty uneven. Some scenes just linger for too long, like a conversation about a fever that just… goes on. Then other crucial bits, like how he actually gets his doctor disguise, happen off-screen in a blink. It’s like they spent all their time on the prodding scene.
And Lew Seymour. He plays a character who seems a bit more suspicious than the others. He follows Clarke around a bit, gives him a stern look or two. But even he doesn't *do* much. He's just kind of there, observing, like the audience. He's the voice in your head going, 'Uh, is anyone else seeing this?'
Is it worth watching? Honestly, only if you're really into the history of cinema and want to see how early filmmakers tackled… well, *lunatics* pretending to be doctors. Or if you like a movie you can chat over with friends, pointing out all the absurdities. It’s a curiosity. A strange, slightly dusty curiosity. Don't expect Body and Soul levels of drama. This is more of a 'What even *is* this?' kind of experience. 😅
IMDb —
1924
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