I watched Chérie (1931) and I still don't know how to be charming

So, is Chérie worth your time today? Honestly, only if you really like that grainy, crackly 1930s vibe where everyone sounds like they are talking through a tin can. 📻

If you enjoy lighthearted French comedies where nobody has real problems, you will probably have a good time. People who want deep plots or high-stakes action should definitely skip this one and watch something like Vengeance instead.

The whole movie is basically about this guy, played by Fernand Gravey, who gets a boarding school for girls dropped in his lap. Instead of doing the normal thing and selling it or hiring a real principal, he decides to teach the girls "charm."

It is a bit of a weird premise when you think about it for more than five seconds. A grown man teaching a bunch of teenage girls how to be attractive and polite feels a little icky by modern standards, but the movie plays it so innocent that you kind of just roll with it.

Fernand Gravey is actually pretty likable here. He has this very bouncy energy, like he’s constantly about to start a race or jump over a sofa.

The girls in the school all look like they are having the time of their lives. They move in these big groups, almost like a human wave of silk dresses and bobbed hair.

I noticed one girl in the back of the classroom scenes who just kept staring directly at the camera. It was super distracting once I saw it, and now I can’t unsee it. 😂

The music is... fine. It is not exactly catchy like Blue Skies, but it fills the silence.

There is this one scene where they are all in the dining hall, and the way they handle the forks and knives is so formal it feels like a military drill. I wonder if people actually ate like that in 1931 or if it was just for the movie.

Marguerite Moreno shows up as the headmistress, and she is easily the best part. She has a face that looks like it was carved out of very grumpy granite.

Every time she looks at the camera, I felt like I was getting in trouble for something I didn't even do. She has way more screen presence than the lead actors, even when she isn't saying anything.

The sets are clearly just painted wood and canvas. You can see the floorboards shaking a little bit when the girls dance too hard. 💃

It reminds me a bit of the stagey feel in The Capitol, where you can almost smell the dust in the theater. I kind of miss when movies looked this handmade and imperfect.

The script was co-written by Alice Duer Miller, who wrote a lot of these "Charm School" stories. You can tell it was originally a play because everyone stands in a semi-circle whenever they talk.

Nobody ever just sits down naturally. They always have to "perform" sitting down.

I liked the part where they try to sneak out of the school. It’s the only time the movie feels like it has any actual momentum.

Otherwise, it’s just a lot of standing around and talking about feelings that don't seem very real. It’s much lighter than something like Deep Waters, which is probably a good thing if you’re tired.

The sound quality is pretty rough in the the version I saw. Sometimes the music drowns out the dialogue, and you just have to guess what they said based on their hand gestures.

There is a lot of shrugging in this movie. French people in the 30s were apparently the world masters of the expressive shrug.

Sunshine Woodward has a great name, but she doesn't get a whole lot to do. She mostly just looks pretty and reacts to whatever Fernand is doing.

I found myself wondering what happened to the actual teachers at the school. Did they all just get fired so this guy could teach everyone how to walk with books on their heads?

The movie doesn't care about the details, so I guess I shouldn't either. It’s a trifle, as they say. 🍰

If you've seen The Little Giant, you know how these early talkies can feel a bit stiff. Chérie is definitely stiff, but it has a certain sweetness that keeps it from being boring.

One specific moment that made me laugh was when a character tripped over a rug. It looked like a real accident that they just decided to keep in the movie because film was expensive.

I like those little human mistakes. It makes the movie feel less like a product and more like a bunch of people trying to figure out how to make a "talkie" for the first time.

The ending is exactly what you think it will be. There are no surprises here, just a lot of smiling faces and probably a wedding off-screen.

Is it a masterpiece? No way. It’s not even as good as The Lone Wolf Returns in terms of pacing.

But for a lazy Sunday afternoon, it’s a nice little relic. It is short, it is colorful (well, in spirit, it's black and white obviously), and it doesn't ask much of you.

Just don't expect to actually learn anything about charm. Most of their advice involves just tilting your head and smiling until the other person gets confused.

Also, the hats. My god, the hats in this movie are massive.

I don't know how they kept their balance. Maybe that was the real secret of the charm school.

Things I Noticed:

• The piano player in the background looks like he wants to go home.
• Someone is wearing a dress that looks like it's made of tinsel.
• The subtitles (if you use them) sometimes just give up during the songs.
• Marguerite Moreno’s eyebrows deserve their own billing in the credits.

Anyway, it’s fine. Not great, but fine. 🎞️