Die Leuchter des Kaisers: A Dusty Old Chase

If you have a spare evening and a fondness for black-and-white coats with too many buttons, Die Leuchter des Kaisers is worth a look. It is the kind of movie that feels like it belongs in a library, all hushed whispers and people looking nervous in dining halls. If you prefer your thrillers to have car chases or actual stakes, you will probably be bored to tears within twenty minutes.

The plot is a mess of stolen goods and people running away from their pasts. It reminds me a bit of the frantic energy in The Voice of Love, though this one keeps its boots firmly on the ground. Everything moves with that specific, slightly creaky rhythm that 1930s German cinema does so well.

I found myself staring at the background furniture more than the leads. There is a candelabra in the second act that seems to have more personality than half the cast. Seriously, watch the way the actors skirt around it like it’s a bomb about to go off. It is hilariously intense for absolutely no reason.

Fritz Imhoff is in here doing his usual thing. He always looks like he is trying to remember if he left the stove on back home. It is a grounding performance, even if he doesn't have much to do besides look worried in shadows. 🎭

There is a scene near the middle where two characters talk for what feels like a week. The dialogue is snappy, sure, but the camera just sits there. It does not move. It does not cut. It just stares at them until you feel like an intruder.

It’s not quite as chaotic as Tarzan and His Mate, obviously, but it has its own weird momentum. You stop trying to track the plot and just let the fancy hats wash over you. Sometimes that is enough.

Random Notes:

• The lighting in the ballroom is surprisingly dark. Everyone looks like a ghost.
• I’m pretty sure one of the extras in the back is just reading a newspaper.
• The pacing is erratic. It sprints for five minutes, then naps for ten.
• Johannes Heesters is basically just there to look dashing, and he succeeds.

It is definitely not a perfect film. It is a bit dusty. But if you watch it with a stiff drink, it’s a perfectly fine way to lose an hour. Just don’t expect a masterpiece that changes your life.