Le Million is the most fun you can have with a 1931 French movie

If you are looking for something to watch tonight that feels like a warm hug but also a bit like a fever dream, this is it. You should watch this if you like old-school comedies or if you just want to see how people made movies when sound was brand new. If you hate black and white movies or subtitles, you will probably be bored out of your mind in five minutes.

It is 1931 and René Clair is basically playing with his new toys. Most movies from this year, like Applause, were still trying to figure out how to talk and move at the same time. But Le Million doesn't just talk; it sings and dances and runs around like it had too much coffee.

The whole plot is about a jacket. Michel is a painter who owes everyone money, especially the butcher and the landlord. They are literally sitting in his studio waiting for him to pay up. Then he finds out he won the lottery. 13 is the winning number, which I thought was a nice touch because usually that is unlucky.

But his girlfriend, Beatrice, gives his old jacket to a guy named 'Grand Père' who is running away from the police. The ticket is in the jacket. Now the whole movie is just people chasing this ugly coat all over Paris. It’s simple, maybe too simple, but it works.

The way they use sound is so weird and cool. It is not a musical where people stop to sing a big ballad. Instead, the music just sort of happens. People talk in rhythm. Even the debt collectors have a little song. It feels very natural even though it is totally fake.

There is this one scene in an opera house that is probably the best part. Michel and his rival are fighting over the jacket behind the curtains. Instead of hearing them grunt or fight, Clair uses the sound of a football crowd. You hear whistles and cheering while these two guys in tuxedos are wrestling. It is so funny and I didn't expect it at all.

The sets look like they are made of cardboard and paper. I don't mean that in a bad way. It looks like a giant pop-up book. Everything is white and grey and very bright. It makes Paris look like a playground instead of a real city. I think that was the point.

René Lefèvre plays Michel and he has this face that just looks permanently confused. He is great at physical comedy. There is a bit where he has to pretend to be an opera singer and he looks like he wants to melt into the floor. I felt that in my soul.

I noticed that the movie moves really fast. Usually, movies from the early 30s have these long silences where nothing happens because the cameras were too heavy to move. Not this one. It feels zippy. The camera follows people up stairs and through windows. It’s almost exhausting to keep up with.

The ending is a bit chaotic. There is a lot of dancing and everyone is happy, which feels a bit unearned, but I didn't care. By that point, I was just happy they found the stupid jacket. Le Million doesn't try to teach you a lesson or be deep. It just wants to show you a good time for eighty minutes.

One thing that bothered me was the girlfriend, Beatrice. She’s a bit of a wet blanket for most of the movie. She gets mad at Michel for the smallest things. But I guess you need some drama to keep the chase going. Also, the police in this movie are completely useless, which is a classic trope that I always enjoy.

If you pay attention to the background, there are all these small details. Like the way the shopkeeper keeps rearranging his dummies. Or the way the crowd moves in total sync like they are part of a ballet. It’s very choreographed. You can tell they practiced these scenes a lot.

Anyway, it’s a good movie. It’s not a 'masterpiece' in the boring way people use that word. It’s just a very well-made toy. Go watch it if you can find a good copy. The sound can be a bit scratchy because it's old, but that just adds to the vibe.

Things I noticed:

• The sheer amount of dust in the opera house scene.
• The way the winning ticket looks like a tiny piece of trash.
• Grand Père is actually a pretty polite criminal.
• The landlord has a really impressive hat.
• There is a lot of running. Like, a lot.
• The singing is actually kind of catchy after a while.

It’s a bit of a shame we don't make movies like this anymore. Everything is so serious now. Sometimes you just want to watch a bunch of French people chase a jacket while a choir sings about it. Is that too much to ask?