Orchids to You: A Romance That Needs More Fertilizer

Is it worth your time?

Honestly, only if you have a very specific craving for black-and-white dramas that move at the speed of a growing plant. If you like classic Hollywood banter, you might find something to like here. But if you’re looking for anything resembling actual human stakes or chemistry, you’re probably going to be bored to tears within twenty minutes.

The whole setup is just silly. Jean Muir is doing her best to look busy in a flower shop, but every time the camera cuts to her, it feels like she’s waiting for a bus. Then the landlord stuff happens, and suddenly we are in a courtroom. Because nothing says romance like litigation, right?

John Boles plays the lawyer with this weird, permanent look of mild confusion, like he’s trying to remember if he left his stove on back at his apartment. It’s not exactly a burning flame of passion between these two. It’s more like two people politely asking for the time while standing in the rain. 🌧️

I found myself staring at the background extras more than the leads. There’s this one scene in the courtroom where a guy in the back row is just… looking at his own fingernails for what felt like a solid minute. I don't know who he is, but he was having a way better time than the characters in the foreground.

Some random notes from my notepad:

• Margaret Dumont is there, which is always a treat, even if she's just filling space.
• The dialogue feels like it was written by someone who heard a rumor about how people talk to each other but never actually tried it.
• The flowers look surprisingly fake. Like, plastic-store-bought fake.
• Why is everyone so obsessed with this lawsuit? It’s a flower shop! Let her have the flowers!

There's a strange lack of urgency in the writing. The plot keeps saying, "Oh no, the shop is in trouble!" but nobody acts like it. It’s less The Flower Girl and more a polite disagreement over a dry sandwich.

I couldn't help but think about how much tighter the pacing is in something like Men Without Women. Even at its grumpiest, that film knew where it was going. Orchids to You just wanders around the lobby until the credits decide to roll.

It’s fine. It’s a movie. You can watch it while folding laundry and you won't miss a single emotional beat because there really aren't any. Just a lot of suits and some wilting petals. 🥀