The Doorman's Opera: A weird, frantic little musical time capsule

If you're the type of person who digs through deep-cut archives looking for forgotten musical curiosities, The Doorman's Opera is probably worth a look. It is short, weird, and feels like it was filmed in a fever dream. If you need a coherent story or pacing that makes sense, you are going to hate this with a burning passion.

The whole thing is basically four clubs, four acts, and a lot of stage makeup. The premise is so flimsy it barely exists. We follow a doorman, and for some reason, we just hop between stages watching people perform. It’s not an opera, obviously. It’s a variety show that forgot to hire a writer for the bridge scenes.

The Acts

• Kay, Katja, and Kay: Their dancing is surprisingly sharp, though I spent most of the time wondering if they were actually related or just really committed to the bit.
• Thelma Leeds: She sings. It’s fine. It feels like she’s singing to the back row of a stadium, even though she’s clearly in a tiny, cramped room.
• The Shirley Temple bit: This was the weirdest part. The ensemble cast doing a burlesque of the Shirley Temple craze is… intense. It’s dated in a way that feels almost uncomfortable today.
• Charlotte Arren: She does a burlesque of a prima donna that felt like it went on for ten minutes longer than it needed to. She’s giving it her all, though. You have to respect the hustle.

The transition between clubs is just brutal. It feels like someone just cut the film with a pair of scissors and hoped for the best. There’s no flow. Just BAM, we are in a new room with a new set of curtains.

It makes me think of Modeling in a weird, distant way. Not because they are the same movie, but because they both have that feeling of being a showcase for talent that just hasn't found a home yet. It’s like watching a demo reel that somehow got distributed.

There is this one shot where you can see the edge of the stage set, and I’m pretty sure I saw a grip’s hand reaching out to adjust a light. It doesn't matter, but it's that kind of movie. It’s not trying to be Little Lord Fauntleroy. It’s just trying to fill time.

The whole thing is very loud for how small the production feels. Everyone is projected at a level ten. It’s exhausting after twenty minutes. But, honestly? It’s kind of refreshing to watch something that isn't trying to be an Important Film. It’s just four clubs and a guy in a uniform. Sometimes that’s enough. 🎭