The Valiant Tailor: A weird, dusty little gem

Is it worth your time?

Look, if you are the type of person who needs crisp 4K visuals and a plot that moves at the speed of a jet engine, skip this. You will be bored out of your mind. But if you have a soft spot for movies that feel like they were filmed inside a basement in 1955, or if you just like watching people try to make giant papier-mâché monsters look menacing, you might actually have a good time.

It’s a dusty, strange little flick. It feels like it belongs on a rainy Sunday afternoon when you have absolutely nothing else going on.

The vibe

The whole thing has this weird, handmade quality. The sets don't look like they cost a fortune—they look like they were built with wood scraps and a lot of glue. Honestly? I kind of liked that. There is a charm to seeing the floorboards creak under the actors' feet.

There is this one scene involving a giant boar that is just… hilarious. You can see the wire attached to the prop if you squint hard enough. It doesn’t pull you out of the movie, though. It just makes you feel like you are sitting right there in the front row of a slightly broken theater production. 🐗

Observations from the couch

• The tailor’s outfit is suspiciously clean for a guy who is supposed to be working in a dirty shop.
• The dialogue is stilted, but in a way that feels almost intentional. Like they were trying to sound like a storybook but forgot how humans actually talk.
• The giants look like they are wearing pajamas. I’m not even joking.

I found myself comparing it to the slow, steady pacing of The Chinese Bungalow, though they aren't really the same genre. Both have that 'captured in time' feeling that modern movies just can't fake, no matter how much money they throw at the color grading.

There is a moment where the tailor is just sitting at his table, stitching away, and the camera lingers for way too long on his needle. Just a single thread going in and out. It’s oddly hypnotic. Maybe the editor just fell asleep at the desk? Either way, I didn't mind.

Final thoughts (or whatever)

It’s not trying to be a masterpiece. It isn't trying to change your life or win an award for being deep. It’s just a story about a guy who lies his way into a hero’s journey. The ending is abrupt—like someone suddenly yanked the plug—but maybe that’s for the best. It leaves you feeling like you just read an old, slightly tattered book.

If you liked the scrappy energy of Scrappy's Theme Song, you will probably find something to enjoy here. Just don't go in expecting a blockbuster. It’s a small, weird, and surprisingly stubborn piece of film. I'm glad I watched it, even if I have no idea why I felt so invested in a giant in pajamas. 🧵