Dames: More Busby Berkeley Geometry Than Actual Plot

Is it worth your time?

If you have an itch for those old-school, massive musical numbers that make no spatial sense, Dames is a weird, delightful relic. It’s perfect for people who love the feeling of watching a stage show collapse in real time. If you need a story that doesn't feel like it was duct-taped together between dance rehearsals, stay far away.

There’s a multimillionaire here who hates 'filthy' theater. It’s such a boring motivation, honestly. He spends half the movie acting like a cartoon villain while everyone else is just trying to put on a show. It feels like two different movies glued together at the hip.

The Busby Berkeley Effect

Then you get to the musical numbers. My god. The camera starts looking down from the ceiling at these massive, swirling patterns of people, and you forget the guy in the suit is even angry. It’s pure visual hypnosis. It’s almost like the movie is trying to apologize for its own plot by just drowning you in sequins.

• The tap dancing sounds like a hail storm on a tin roof.
• The faces in the background of the numbers look absolutely exhausted.
• I swear the same three extras are in every shot if you squint.

It’s not as cohesive as The Iceman's Ball, but it has that same frantic energy. The humor feels like it was written in a rush. Some of it lands, but most of it is just Guy Kibbee looking bewildered at a situation that wasn't that funny to begin with. Seriously, the guy is just always confused.

The pacing is a total wreck. You get ten minutes of people arguing about money or morality, and then suddenly we are in a kaleidoscopic nightmare of legs and hats. I didn't hate it. It’s like eating a giant bowl of sugar for dinner. Not nutritious, but you won't remember the dull parts by the time you're finished. 💃

Watching these people try to act serious about 'the sanctity of the stage' while wearing those costumes is a special kind of comedy. It reminds me of the absurdity in Mrs. Black Is Back, just with more top hats. Don't look for logic here. Just look at the ceiling patterns.