Half Pint Polly Review: A Weird Ranch Short with a Monkey

If you have twenty minutes and a weird obsession with 1930s ranch shorts, sure, give it a go.

But if you are looking for a deep plot or anything that makes total sense... maybe skip this one. 🐴

Polly comes back from four years at school and for some reason she has a pet monkey.

Nobody asks about the monkey. It just exists.

Mona Ray plays Polly, and she has this high-pitched energy that is a bit much for a ranch setting.

She reminds me a bit of her role in Carmen, Jr., just with more dust and horses.

The ranch is getting ready for a big race, but some bad guys decide to kidnap the rider.

It is the most polite kidnapping I have ever seen.

They just sort of grab him and hide him in a shack near the edge of the property.

The stakes feel weirdly low because the monkey is usually in the corner of the frame doing something more interesting. 🐒

There is a scene where Polly is trying to look all "grown up" but she is still basically a kid.

The script keeps insisting she has changed, but the monkey is definitely the biggest change in the house.

The horse race at the end is actually pretty well shot for a movie this old.

You can see the dirt flying and the horses look like they are actually trying to run.

It is not exactly The Artist when it comes to style or silent-era vibes.

It is more like a Saturday morning filler that someone forgot to throw away in the archives.

One guy, I think it was Bobby Dunn, does a reaction shot that lasts way too long.

He just stares at the monkey like he is seeing a ghost for about five seconds too many.

The bad guys are super obvious because they wear darker hats and look generally grumpy.

Albert J. Smith plays the villain with a sneer that feels like it belongs in a cartoon.

The whole thing feels rushed, which I guess is the point of a short film.

But the transition from "Hey Polly is home" to "Oh no, a kidnapping" happens in like two minutes flat.

If you like old westerns that do not take themselves seriously, it is a fun distraction.

Just do not expect it to be as intense as something like Arsenal.

The ending is exactly what you think it is.

The horse wins, the bad guys lose, and the monkey is still there hanging around. 🏁

I kept waiting for the monkey to ride the horse.

Spoiler alert: it does not happen, which is a huge missed opportunity if you ask me.