Stan Laurel, a cow, and some very weird flirting in Should Tall Men Marry?

You should probably watch this if you have twenty minutes and like seeing Stan Laurel look confused. It’s not a masterpiece like some of the later stuff, but it’s got a weird energy that works. 🤠

If you hate silent slapstick or guys falling over for no reason, you will definitely hate this. It’s very much a product of its time, dusty and a bit chaotic.

The plot is basically just an excuse for Stan to be a ranch hand. He’s trying to help this very shy guy talk to Martha because she's being pursued by a creep.

But the way he does it is... well, he uses a calf. I’m not even kidding.

Stan starts petting this baby cow and whispering to it like he’s practicing a hot date. It’s easily the most uncomfortable and hilarious thing in the whole short.

The cow looks extremely bored. I wonder if they had to feed it extra grain to keep it still while Stan was doing his weird little bit.

There is a moment where the calf almost knocks him over and you can see Stan break character for a split second. He almost laughs, then goes right back into being the "expert" flirt.

Then you have James Finlayson. He has that mustache that seems to have a life of its own, always twitching.

Cinematic perspective: Exploring the visual vocabulary of Should Tall Men Marry? (1928) through its definitive frames.

He and Stan spend more time hitting each other than actually fighting the bad guys. It’s that classic frustration comedy where nobody is actually helping.

The villain’s name is Snake-tail Sharkey. That is a 10/10 name.

I wish modern movies had names like that instead of just 'Steve' or 'Dave'. It really sets the stakes when the bad guy sounds like a weird mythical creature.

Sharkey’s men are basically just guys in hats who look like they’ve been sitting in the sun too long. One of them has a hat so big it keeps slipping over his eyes during the fight scenes.

There's a bit in the barn where everything just descends into total chaos. It feels like they didn't really choreograph it much.

They probably just told everyone to run around and look panicked until the film ran out. It reminded me a bit of the vibe in Set Free, just with more dirt and hay.

The film quality is a bit grainy, but you can see the dust kicking up from the horses. It makes the whole thing feel very real and hot, like you can smell the manure.

I noticed one of the henchmen trips over a wooden bucket in the background. It clearly wasn't a stunt because he almost face-plants into a post.

Cinematic perspective: Exploring the visual vocabulary of Should Tall Men Marry? (1928) through its definitive frames.

He just genuinely tripped and kept going because film was expensive back then. That’s the kind of stuff I love about these old silents.

It’s messy. It’s not polished like a Marvel movie where everything is perfect and boring.

The title doesn't really have much to do with the movie, honestly. I kept waiting for a tall man to show up and have a wedding crisis.

Maybe it’s a joke I’m too modern to get. Or maybe they just picked a title that sounded catchy for the 1920s crowd.

It’s similar to how The Perfect Woman doesn't always live up to its name either. Titles back then were just vibes.

The ending says 'right triumphs' which is a bit of a cliché. But you don't watch this for the deep moral lessons or the writing.

You watch it to see Stan Laurel pretend a cow is his girlfriend. And for that alone, it’s a win in my book. 🐄

One reaction shot from Finlayson lasts way too long. He just stares at the camera with his eyes bulging out for like ten seconds.

It stops being funny, becomes awkward, and then becomes funny again. That’s the sweet spot of silent comedy right there.

If you're looking for something sophisticated, look elsewhere. But if you want to see a man teach another man how to woo a woman by talking to livestock, this is your film.