The Gay Caballero: A B-Western that forgets to be subtle

Is it worth your time?

Honestly? Maybe if you’ve got a rainy afternoon and a very low bar for what constitutes a "plot." If you love old-school, no-frills Westerns where everyone is either heroic or sneaky, you’ll probably have a decent time. If you need a movie that actually makes sense or has a consistent tone, stay far away.

This movie is basically a 1930s excuse to put George O’Brien on a horse and see what happens. He plays Ted, this big-shot football player who shows up at a ranch looking like he just stepped off a college campus. It’s a bit jarring, but the movie doesn't really care.

Notes from the couch

• The transition from 'football star' to 'cattle rancher' happens in about ten seconds flat. Why waste time on logic?
• Victor McLaglen is chewing through the scenery so hard I’m surprised there’s anything left of the set.
• The mask for El Coyote is... a choice. It looks like it was cut out of a felt hat in the dark.

There is a lot of running around in this one. People are constantly jumping behind fences or whispering in shadows. It feels like The Honor of His House might have had a more cohesive script, but that’s not really the point here.

The chemistry between O'Brien and Conchita Montenegro is fine, I guess. It’s mostly just them staring longingly across rooms while people plot murders in the background. The romantic tension is about as subtle as a sledgehammer, but hey, it’s a B-movie.

Cinematic perspective: Exploring the visual vocabulary of The Gay Caballero (1932) through its definitive frames.

There’s this one scene where they’re talking about cattle theft, and for a second, I thought the movie might actually get serious. Nope. Five seconds later, we’re back to jokes and horse riding. It’s like the writers were terrified of us getting bored for even a minute.

It’s not as chaotic as The Pajama Party, but it’s got its own weird energy. It’s a bit like watching someone try to solve a crossword puzzle while riding a roller coaster. You get the gist of it, but the details are all blurred by the wind.

I found myself staring at the background extras more than the main cast at some points. There’s a guy in a wide-brimmed hat near the ranch entrance who seems to be holding his breath for the entire duration of the scene. I really wanted him to just exhale.

It’s fine. It’s just fine. Don't go looking for deep meaning, or you'll leave disappointed. Sometimes a cowboy movie is just a cowboy movie.